Those grappling with suicidal thoughts may not show obvious signs of their challenges to others. However, there are particular risk factors that we can all remain mindful of.
| Sign | Description |
|---|---|
| Mention of suicide | Sharing information on attempts made to end their life. |
| Suicide in the family | Loved one has died by suicide, recently or in the past. |
| Traumatic upbringing | A painful childhood, physical, or emotional abuse. |
| Major life crisis | Experiencing divorce, a major job loss, or family estrangement. |
| Feelings of isolation | Feeling alone, misunderstood, wronged, or that an injustice has been done against them that cannot be rectified. |
| Lack of support | Family and support network is very small, unstable, or non-existent. |
| Disengagement | No interest in work, study, or social life. |
| Withdrawal | Stopped hobbies or distanced from relationships they once valued. |
| Spiritual disconnect | Abandoned religious practices and question faith or purpose, e.g. not going to the mosque anymore or breaking fast with others. |
| Bitterness or resentment | Expressing anger at close ones or society in general. |
| Emotional instability | Periods of severe distress or erratic/spiralling emotions. |
| Addictive behaviour | Gambling, pornography, drugs, alcohol, etc. seem to dominate their life. |
| Chronic health issues | Struggling with incurable illness or long-term physical pain. |
Generally, the more risk factors a person has, the more likely they’ll have suicidal thoughts.
Things you may hear them say
- “Allah hates me.”
- “What is the point of life?”
- “My existence is pointless.”
- “I have let other people down.”
- “There’s no solutions to my problem.”
- “My parents/family/spouse see me as a failure.”
- “I am a burden on others, they would be better off without me.”
- “They will regret what they’ve done to me when I’m gone.”
- “I have lost everything that made life worth living.”
- “I have been disgraced and everyone knows.”
- “Why do we need to suffer so much?”
- “Every day is a struggle to survive.”
- “I have not achieved anything.”
- “Why did Allah create me?
Sudden switches in behaviour
Someone you may know may have had a low mood for months or years. Other times, they may have a rapid shift in personality.
Everybody manages their behaviour differently, and their baseline behaviours likewise vary. There are some changes in character and lifestyle that can be warning signs that someone is a suicide risk.
Be mindful if you see a loved one exhibit:
| Behaviour | Description |
|---|---|
| Unusual beliefs or speech | Saying strange or out-of-character things about their beliefs, purpose, or existence. |
| Anger at Allah | Expressing rage or frustration at Allah or the fate they have been dealt, unable to accept their situation. |
| Anxious in company | Appears uneasy or restless around others (even with you) when they were once comfortable. |
| Irritability | Easily angered or confrontational over small or minor issues. |
| Dangerous decisions | Engages in reckless, spontaneous, or harmful behaviour that puts them or others at risk. |
| Social withdrawal | Stops engaging in conversations, gatherings, mosque, or community spaces. |
| Reckless behaviour | Takes harmful risks or behaves dangerously without care for consequences. |
| Disturbed sleep | Sleeps excessively during the day or avoids sleep entirely. |
| Excessive isolation | Spends long periods alone without explanation. |
| Unknown interactions | Regularly talking to unfamiliar people or online communities they don’t know. |
| Loss of interest | No motivation for previously enjoyed routines, such as prayer, Qur’an, hobbies, sports, or other activities. |
| Self-deprecating talk | Says negative things about themselves; sabotages good opportunities. |
| No future outlook | Shows no interest in making plans for work and leisure, or continuing with existing commitments. |
| Giving away belongings | Donates or gives away money and prized items, as if preparing for final departure. |
Always do these things
Trust your gut instinct that someone is struggling and potentially thinking about suicide. Speak and act in a timely way (check out this resource for more).
Know that openly raising the topic of suicide will not make a suicidal person more likely to take their life. In fact, it may be the opening of conversation and a release that they needed to explore, to better understand why they are feeling this way.
Remember who they were before these shifts in their character — whether owing to depression, poor mental health, or other factors.
Never accept them struggling as “the new normal”.